


The Full Mountie

by dsa_archivist



Category: due South
Genre: Alternate Universe, Challenge Response, F/M, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1999-09-12
Updated: 1999-09-12
Packaged: 2018-11-11 00:28:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11137644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dsa_archivist/pseuds/dsa_archivist
Summary: Frannie, Meg and Stella go to a strip club and the entertainment turns out to be Ben,Ray and Turnbull.





	The Full Mountie

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Speranza, the archivist: this story was once archived at [Due South Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Due_South_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Due South Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/duesoutharchive).

 

 

The Full Mountie

**The Full Mountie**

**By Postcard**

postcard@manutd.com 

**Rating: - R. Challenge. Humour. Romance.**

**Disclaimer: -** The characters in this story (Ben, Frannie, Meg, Stella, Ray Kowolski and Turnbull) are not mine and anything else Due South isn't mine either. I do not mean to infringe on copyrights held by any copyright holders for Due South. The story "The Full Mountie" however is mine (copyright 10 September 1999 by Postcard on all original story content.) The title of the story is not my idea it is from an advert on television, (a Lucozade one I think) but I thought that it sounded just right for this story and I do not mean to infringe on anyone who owns the title. None of the songs in this story are mine either. Please do not reproduce for anything other than personal reading without the written consent of author. This story is not written for profit and the author does not give permission for this story to be reproduced for profit.

**Author's note: -** This story is set in season 3 but Meg has not cut her hair. I think that this is definitely a challenge story as I doubt that Meg would dare to do some of the things I get her to do, well not in public any way! And to my knowledge there is no club called the 'Passion Palace', I just made it up. Hope you have a good laugh reading this and any constructive comments are welcome.

* * *

Frannie, Meg and Stella headed down the street towards the large neon blue flashing lights that announced the club as the 'Passion Palace'. The doorman, a big hulking mass of a man gave them each a long leering look. It wasn't surprising really because they were dressed in the shortest skirts they could get away with without being arrested for indecent exposure.

Once inside they approached the long curving bar and ordered themselves a drink. Frannie ordered a 'Blue Nun', Meg a 'Sex on the Beach' and Stella settled for a 'G and T'. As they sat down at a round silver table spotlights homed in on the stage and the curtain went up. The music suddenly changed from a dance beat to "Freak Me" by Another Level. The lyrics "Let me lick you up and down till you say stop. Let me play with your body baby make you real hot", echoed through the club. And out onto the stage stumbled Ben, Ray and Turnbull all dressed in red serge.

Meg's jaw dropped open in shock. "Is that�?" Asked Frannie in disbelief. Meg and Stella could only nod in amazement. "Oh, this is just perfect. They're never gonna live this one down," Frannie said with glee. 

"What the hell are they doing here? Ray had better not be checking up on me or I'll kill him," exploded Stella. "Do you know why they're here?" Stella directed the question at Meg.

"I have no idea. Why should I know why they're here?"

"I just wondered, seeing as they're all in a mountie uniform," explained Stella.

A wicked smile formed on Frannie's face. "You know we could have some real fun with them! What d'ya say?"

"Count me in," agreed Meg with an equally wicked smile forming on her face.

"Me too." As Stella said this they all rose from their chairs and headed towards the stage where women were baring the men's way by the steps.

The three men stood there nervously with the 'deer caught in a trap while a hunter approached carrying a gun' look on their faces. However, the deer was them and the hunter carrying the gun was about a hundred women. And from the looks of the women, the men didn't just have a hundred rowdy women to contend with, they had a hundred majority drunken women to deal with. Even though these women didn't appear to be carrying any guns, however, one never knew in Chicago, a group of women drunk could quite easily if they chose to, cause more damage than any hunter. 

"Lets get the hell outta here," Ray whispered to Ben and Turnbull. But as they tried to walk down the steps at the front of the stage the women blocked their way. They definitely were like a deer caught in a trap now.

"Where do you think you're going? We paid to see some strippers so you'd better strip."

"Erm ma 'am�I think that you are misunderstood. We are not strippers. We are here on police business," Ben tried to explain.

"Yes, of course you are darling. And what police _business_ do you have in mind? If you want to be kinky and handcuff me to you, I'm all for that. I love the mountie outfits by the way." 

" _Oh dear!_ " the three men said in unison. 

"What are we gonna do? Fraser think of somethin quick," Ray said franticly. They turned to look backstage and saw the four men they had been trying to get away from pointing their guns right at the three trapped deer on stage.

"Well, we can't go back that way," Ben stated the obvious. "As long as we're out here they won't shoot us. They wouldn't risk doing that in front of all of these witnesses," he assured his fellow captives.

The three men scanned the room for a way out of the situation and their gazes fell on Frannie, Meg and Stella.

" _Oh dear!_ "

" _Oh shit,_ it's Stella, Frannie and _even worse_ the Ice Queen is with them."

" _Arrhhh_ , it's the Inspector."

Frannie, Meg and Stella pushed their way to the front of the stage, elbowing women out of the way as they did.

"It might not be as bad as we think�" reasoned Ben.

"Oh yeah! How do ya work that one out?" Cut in Ray.

"Well, look on the positive side, they can help us to get out of this---er---situation."

"Fraser, Turnbull, Detective, might I ask what are you doing here? Surely you're not tonight's entertainment?" Meg asked.

"Er no Sir, we're definitely not tonights entertainment. We're here investigating a crime and---with bad timing we ended up on stage. We---um can't go backstage because�" Ben indicated over his shoulder to the men with guns.

"Ah, I see constable."

"Can you get us outta here?" Ray asked the women with hope clearly noticeable in his voice.

"Oh, I don't know! Could be kinda tricky with only us three against a hundred or so women. What do you think Meg? Stella?"

"I think you're right. We can't fight off all of these women. No, there's only one thing for it---you'll have to strip," Meg said and looked at the three trapped deer, a sadistic smile turning up the edges of her mouth. They looked as though Meg had just pointed a gun at them and cocked the trigger. Meg even thought that they were contemplating taking their chances with the four men with guns rather than strip. _Surely they wouldn't be that stupid?_

" _What! No way_. We're _not_ strippers," exploded Ray.

"You are tonight," Frannie stated wickedly.

" _Please,_ Sir!" Ben pleaded to Meg, he looked so defenseless that she nearly gave in. Nearly but not quite. He had tortured her enough in the time that she had known him, not physically but emotionally. He was like a double chocolate fudge cake, so tempting and you know it will taste delicious and that you'll want more---and more. But you also know the consequences of eating the cake, you put on weight and not everybody likes you if you do that! She knew damn well her Superiors wouldn't. And so she had not eaten the cake, but it was there on the menu everyday tempting her to eat it.

"All right Fraser, we'll compromise. You strip and the three of us will get you out of here in one piece. Deal?"

"Can't ya get us out before?" Begged Ray.

"If you go back stage those men will shoot you. If you don't strip these women will mob you. You don't have much choice. But if you strip you'll have done your part as far as the women are concerned and we will be able to get you out of here through the front entrance. There'll probably be a few women who want more, but we can deal with them, right ladies?" 

"Right," Frannie nodded her head in agreement.

"Most definitely," confirmed Stella.

"So is it a deal?" Meg asked again.

"Deal," replied the three deer in an unenthusiastic unison, because basically they had no choice.

"Oh and those uniforms don't belong to you, they belong to the R.C.M.P., so you'd better throw them to only us three otherwise we won't get them back. I won't even ask why you're wearing an R.C.M.P. issue uniform Detective, just make sure it's returned in one piece."

"By the way Ray, we want the 'Full Monty,' everything off," teased Stella.

"Yep guys, all of these women have paid to see everything come off," added Frannie.

"Not a stitch of clothing must stay on. You do believe in people getting what they have paid for don't you Fraser?" Meg knew that he did under normal circumstances and she enjoyed watching him squirm at her question. At last! The mountie had been caught by his own honarary code. She had put him in an awkward situation and she liked it, because he couldn't very well not do the 'Full Monty' now. Not after she had put that question to him, because it would go against everything that he held close to his heart about justice and a consumers right to get what they paid for.

All three women looked at one another and an evil smile crossed each of their pretty faces as they sang together: - "You can leave your hat on." Frannie, Meg and Stella then burst out laughing.

Once the hysterics had subsided Meg started the chorus "Off, off, off." And all of the hundred or so women joined in the chant with her. Meg stood soley watching Ben, she wasn't interested in the other two and she didn't want to miss a second of her opportunity to see Ben. _*_ Well, I've _always_ wanted to see Ben naked, but I couldn't because of my position as his Superior Officer. It _isn't_ _exactly_ the circumstances I have dreamed of, but at least I get to see him as I've _always wanted to_ without it being too inappropriate. * Inappropriate, _of course_ it was inappropriate, but at least Ottawa couldn't blame her for this!

Ben, Ray and Turnbull started to do a striptease. Ben threw his clothes to Meg as she was stood directly in front of him. Turnbull threw his to Frannie and Ray who was stood in the middle of the two men threw his to Stella. First the lanyard came off, then the Sam Browne, followed by their boots and socks. The later two items particurlay the boots when thrown to Meg nearly knocked her out and the socks landed on top of her head.

"Alright!" Shouted Frannie and whooped enthusiastically.

The tunic was the next item of clothing to be removed and then the jodphurs. With all of the chanting and cheering Ray was actually getting into the mood of things and was unbelievably starting to enjoy himself. He was even swinging his jodphurs around in the air above his head before letting them go soaring through the air to be caught expertly by Stella. Fraser and Turnbull on the other hand, were still looking terrified and were stripping in somewhat of a fumbled fashion. 

Fraser stood in front of Meg apprehensively, he was wearing only his white tee-shirt and white boxer shorts. He was working up the courage to remove said items of clothing. It was amazing how running into a burning building didn't make him bat an eyelid, but the prospect of stripping down to total nakedness virtually terrified the boxer shorts off him anyway. It wasn't fair that Meg was going to get to see him naked and he was never going to see her without any clothes on. Oh, how he wanted to see her naked...to touch her in her intimate places and hear his name shouted in ecstacy from her lips. But she was his Superior Officer nothing more. * _Here goes_. * Ben took a deep breath and pulled his shirt off and slung it to Meg. With one swift movement he then reached down and stripped the last article of clothing off him and threw his boxer shorts at Meg.

All three men stood on the stage stark naked. Meg stared in pleasant shock at Ben, his body was so handsome. The only marks on his body were some minor scars from where he had been knifed and shot, this only made Meg want him more because it showed how gallant he was. She looked at the sand-smooth contours of his chest and her gaze sweeped down to his manhood. Meg gasped, he was more than adequetly endowed. Meg was no stranger to seeing a mans tackle but she had never seen one as large or enticing as Ben's.

A woman in the audience rushed forward and pulled an object out of her handbag. Oh no, what the hell has she got? rushed through the men's heads, was it a gun? No, it was far worse than a gun in their eyes, it was a bottle of chocolate sauce. The woman squeezed the contents all over the three 'deer' and shouted, "Who's gonna lick it off?"

Ben didn't waste any time he reached down off the stage and grabbed Meg, pulling her up onto the stage in front of him. If anyone was going to do something so intimate to him then Meg was the only person he wanted to do it. Ray followed suit pulling Stella up on stage and Turnbull decided to pull Frannie up on stage to 'assist' him.

_* Oh my! Surely Ben isn't wanting me to lick chocolate sauce off him?_ I _won't_ be able to control myself. Although, who says dreams don't come true? Coz mine _certainly has_ if that's what he wants me to do. _*_ She looked him directly in the eyes and then at the chocolate sauce dripping down his chest and abdomen. Meg then looked him questionably in the eyes and he nodded in assent. * Oh well, here goes, * thought Meg as she dropped his clothes into a pile on the stage and moved towards him. Holding his shoulders, Meg bent her head and started to gently lap the sauce off him. 

* Umm, that tastes good. * She wasn't sure if it was the sweet chocolate sauce that she liked the taste of or whether it was the taste of Ben's salty skin. Either way she wished that they would market the taste in an ice-cream. As the lyrics "Let me lick you up and down till you say stop. Let me play with your body baby make you real hot. Let me do all the things you want me to do. Cause tonight baby I wanna get freaky with you," boomed through the club Meg took heed of the words and started to lick Ben's chest more intently. Meg looked up briefly and saw that Ben had gone a cranberry colour. She wrapped her tongue around each nipple in turn and sucked the chocolate sauce off him as though his nipples were red berries. She heard a sharp intake of breath from him and then he ran his hands through her long silky hair. As Meg made her way due south she realised that the chocolate sauce had dripped down onto his manhood. _* Should I? No, I couldn�t�could I?_ _Well somebody is going to have to clean it off so why shouldn't it be me? *_

Meg quickly glanced up at Ben and he seemed to be enjoying himself from the look of pleasure on his face. She decided to give him some pleasure he wouldn't have banked on. Kneeling down Meg ran her tongue along his tackle to the tip of him; licking the sauce off as she went. He groaned with pleasure and his manhood stood to attention before her eyes. Oh how she would love to take him in her mouth right now but she knew that she couldn't, not in front of all of these people.

Meg stood up and licked the chocolate sauce and another substance off her lips. Ben was breathing heavily and she couldn't resist saying "Did you enjoy that?"

"Yes," Ben answered breathlessly.

Meg looked down and noticed that his manhood was springing to attention more straighter than Ben had even stood to attention, if that was possible. Meg wanted to take him into her now and by the looks of things so did Ben. Meg pulled her gaze from his nether regions and looked him in the face. "You look in pain Ben, I didn't bite you accidently did I?" She couldn't remember doing so.

"No---it's just�oh never mind."

"What is it Fraser please tell me?"

"If you insist. I---I want you badly and I can't have you and it hurts."

"You do?"

"Yes."

"Does this soothe some of the pain?" She reached down and stroked his tackle. It stiffened even more at her touch.

"Yes---erm---that soothes some of the pain but not all of it."

"Maybe I could soothe your pain tonight Ben if you will soothe mine?"

"I'd like that very much."

Meg handed Ben his clothes and he quickly put them on. Frannie, Meg and Stella guided the three men out of the club by the front entrance, pushing overzelous women out of the way.

"Show's over," shouted Meg.

_Or was it?_


End file.
